The Swedish and the Asian
by LadyofWar13
Summary: What Happens when gunner breaks his arm and Maggie shows up to help... Read to find out. Rated M for later chapters and some language
1. Chapter 1

As I carefully got off my rickety old couch mindful of my broken arm I walked into the kitchen to calm my new found hunger. As I pulled the 2 day old Chinese food out of my refrigerator I instantly thought of the Chinese hottie, Maggie, that went on the mission in Albania with the team and I.

"_Wonder what happened to her," _I thought. "_she's probably back in China assinating some Chinese ambassador ."_ After pondering the problem for a moment I was cut off by my phone ringing.

"Hello?" I asked not noticing the number

"_Hey, Gunner how ya doin' buddy? Heard ya broke your arm." _The Asian accent came over the phone.

"Yang! Yeah you heard about that too?"

"_Yeah. So how's your life been since I jumped out of the plane?"_

"Well besides the whole arm in a sling thing sucky as usual." I said as I put the cold Chinese food on a plate and stuck it in the microwave.

"_Same here. Hey I have to go I'll talk to you later, hopefully."_ With that the Asian hung up on me.

"Well that was kind of a short conversation." I said aloud. "Well shit!" I exclaimed as I ran into the kitchen forgetting about the food in the microwave. Taking a cautious bite I quickly ran to the trash and spit it out "Bitch," as I threw the rest of the food in the trash I grabbed my phone and called Pizza Hut.

**45 minutes later**

I quickly walked to the door when I heard someone knock. Thinking it was the pizza man I opened the door money in hand.

"Maggie?! What are you doing here I thought you went back to China with Church." I said motioning her to come in.

"Well Church said that he wasn't going to need me any longer and after a month in China without killing somebody I got board and thought of you guys."

"Well then… I would ask you if you wanted something to eat but I have nothing here until the pizza man gets here." Not 10 seconds after I said that there was another knock at the door. As I opened the door the man, woman rather, handed me the pizza.

"That will be 18.99." the woman said

"No try free you're 16 minutes late." I said as I slammed the door in the woman's face.

"Gunner?"

"Hmm, yes Maggie." I said as I stuffed my face with a piece of pizza.

"How did you break your arm?" she said as she reached for a piece of pizza

"Please tell me you didn't just notice that."

"No, I noticed that when I walked in."

"Good. Well the last mission we went on I was fighting this guy. Gotta at least be 7 feet tall 350 pounds. I could've held him off," I bragged "but after I dropped my gun when he got a lucky shot to me left cheek, dazed I went to punch him and he grabbed my arm and broke it in 4 different places." I said as I grabbed my third piece of pizza. After we finished the first pizza Maggie asked me if I had a bathroom. I replied with my usual smart ass comments "No, I don't I shit in the woods."

"Then where's the t.p. at." The Asian came back at me.

"Down the hall 3rd door on the left in the bathroom." I smiled as she walked down the hall. After a couple minutes she came back looking a little different, looking a little sexier.

"Uhh, Maggie I uhh…."

"Yes, Gunner?" The Asian asked.

"_Damn, Gunner that was a fail…." _I thought "I uhh, wanted to know if you had a place to stay tonight?" I asked trying not to think of anything perverted, but that didn't happen.

"Yea, that motel down the street."

"You ain't stayin' there it's run by a bunch of rapists, crack heads, and drunks. Plus if you stay here it's free." I said as I gave one and a half thumbs up considering my cast.

"My stuffs in my room at the motel." She stated dryly

"Well then you are comin' with me to get your shit and check outta that hell hole." I said standing up.

"Well then what in the hell we waiting for. Let's go!" she said walking out the door into my garage. When I got out there I found the beautiful Asian woman sitting on my chopper.

"_I swear this woman is trying to kill me_." When she saw me standing in the doorway staring she quickly hopped off the bike gave me a small, embarrassed, smile and walked to her bike.

"I-I'm sorry I just uhh, like your bike." The Chinese woman stammered.

"It's fine," I said walking over to me bike. "You wanna ride with me?"

"Uhh, sure…."

"Well, get your helmet on and get your little ass over here." I said slinging my leg over the bike. "Well shit," I stated. "It's kinda hard to drive a bike…. With one hand. Guess we'll have to go in my truck."

As we walked over to the other side of the garage, tripping over some of my old projects, we pulled the tarp off of my 36' Chevy hotrod.

"Wow!" Maggie yelled

"Let me guess. You like this ride to?"

"Uhh, fucking hell yes!"

"Well why are you standin' there like a jackass in the rain get the hell in."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Hey guys sorry for such the short chapter last time I thought it was longer, but this chapter will be longer I promise. Also Like half this chapter will be in Maggie's P.O.V.

**Maggie: two weeks earlier**

"Maggie." Church's voice rang out **"**I no longer have a use for you."

"So you're letting me go?"

"No shit Sherlock." I didn't respond. First because I was pissed, second because that would give me a chance to go back America. Also to visit the Swedish anti-hero that I met on the mission to Albania. I've been thinking about him on a daily basis since I hopped in the chopper with Booker, Church, and Trench. It's been a real pain in the ass but I can't help it.

"Ok, Church but you still owe me for the last mission." With that I turned on my heel and walked off not saying another word. Church just gave me a grunt in approval and walked the opposite way. For the next week I stayed in a small village in the middle of nowhere. Two days after I got there one of Church's men dropped off the 1.3 million he owed me. The next three days I spent talking to the local women, most of them asking about my 'boyfriend'.

"As pretty as you are you must have a boyfriend or a husband." One of the women told me. I replied with "Yes I have a boyfriend, his name is Gunner. He's Swedish." Even thought I knew it was a lie he might as well be, he likes me I like him. It's like all middle school romances Boy likes Girl, Girl like Boy but won't admit it to either one.

Before I left I gave the village half of the 1.3 mil., they thanked me then sent me on my way. I spent the next two and a half days traveling to the closes town with an airport. When I finally found one I realized it was the town I grew up in. Disgusted by all the horrible memories of my childhood I quickly walked to the airport. I paid for the earliest ticket to America. One and a half days later I was there. I quickly got the cheapest bus tickets to the small town in New York. Once there I stopped by at Tool's Tattoos knowing he was one of Gunner's best friends.

"On the outskirts of town it's a blood red house with a huge garage. You can't miss it." He told me.

"Thanks, Mr. Tool!" I yelled as I walked out the door.

"Welcome, and it's just Tool." He yelled back. Once outside I examined the bikes and quickly hotwired one. As I set off for the other side of town seeing all the signs for food I quickly got hungry. I only stopped to check in to this motel Funny Chuck's. Not wanting to wait any longer I ignored my hunger and kept on driving. Once there Tool's words rang through my head

"_You can't miss it…." _He was right you couldn't miss this place. It had to at least be three stories high, (not including the attic) and the garage could hold ten cars easily. And the color Tool was right again it was blood red… literally It was almost if it was painted with real blood. Which I don't doubt in the least. As I got done gaping at the house I walked to the front door. Gunner opened the door almost immediately was an expectant look on his face. That's when I noticed his arm was broke.

"_Was he expecting me? Tool must have called him and told him I asked where he lived." _ I thought.

"Maggie!" The Swede exclaimed. "What are you doing here? I thought you went back to china with Church." He said motioning me in.

"Well Church said that he wasn't going to need me any longer and after a month in China without killing somebody I got board and thought of you guys." I knew it was a lie but he wouldn't know it.

"Well I would ask if you wanted something to eat but I ain't got nothin' to eat till the pizza man gets here." He said. Five seconds later the doorbell rang. Gunner quickly opened the door and took the pizzas. Said something and slammed the door.

"Gunner?"

"Hmm, yes Maggie." He said with a moth full of pizza

"How did you break your arm?"

"Please tell me you didn't just notice that."

"No, I noticed that when I walked in." I said

"Good. Well the last mission we went on I was fighting this guy. Gotta at least be 7 feet tall 350 pounds? I could've held him off," I bragged "but after I dropped my gun when he got a lucky shot to me left cheek, dazed I went to punch him and he grabbed my arm and broke it in 4 different places." He said. Once we finished the pizza I went to the bathroom, and we decided that I would be staying at his house. When I walked out into the garage there it was…. A bright orange chopper with the same skull design that Barney has on his bike. I couldn't help myself. I walked over and straddled the bike.

"_This is fucking awesome!" _I thought. Then I noticed he was staring at me I quickly got off the bike said I was sorry and walked back over to him

"It's fine. You wanna ride with me?" he asked walking over to his bike.

"_Hmm, well let me see your back pressed against me going down the road the wind in my hair… Umm, yes please!"_

"Uhh, sure…." I said

"Well shit, it's kinda hard to drive a bike with one hand. Guess we'll have to take my truck." He said slinging his leg back over the bike. We both tripped over a couple projects that were all dusted, we finally pulled off the tarp….

"_Holy Shit!" _I mentally screamed.

"You like this ride too?" all I could answer with was "Fucking hell yes." After staring at it for a little while he said something I didn't register, I got in.

**Gunner:**

As we pulled in to the motel "Funny Chuck's" Maggie busted out laughing.

"What?" I asked not understanding.

"Look at the sign." She said between giggles. When I did I couldn't help but laugh myself. The lights in the U,N,N,Y,C, and H were out….

"Fuck's! Oh that's hilarious." Maggie busted out laughing again. We sat in the truck for another five minutes. Sides hurting, eyes tearing up, and running out of breath we both finally stopped laughing enough to open the truck doors and walk inside.

"Yea, I'm checking out." She said still trying to hold back a laugh.

"You don't get to check out until I say." The man said slurring his words and grabbing Maggie by the wrists.

"Hey, you bastard let her go!" I said running up to the two. Apparently I didn't need to. Within 5 seconds he was lying on the ground with a broken arm.

"Remind me never to make you mad." I stated dryly.

"I'll try, but it would be simpler if you just didn't make me mad." She came back at me with a laugh.

"Very funny. C'mon lets get your stuff." I said walking back through the hall. Once in the room we found two teens making out on her bed.

"What in the hell do you two think you're doing. Get the hell out!" I must have scared them more than I meant to because the boy ran out of the room and the girl just sat there.

"Whoa!" she exclaimed "A Swedish person and an Asian person as a couple! I can die in piece now!" she said standing and walking out of the room.

"The Fuck?" I said

"Ha-ha, Fuck's" Maggie said laughing again.

"_God she has such beautiful laugh…."_ I thought. After a half a minute of her laughing I had to laugh again. This time the laughing only lasted about a minute. We finally got her stuff and walked back into the lobby to find the guy with his arm broke sitting in one of the cockroach infested chairs crying.

"Never gets old." I said chuckling.

When we both got back in the truck I turned on the radio, my favorite song Back in Black came on. I couldn't help myself and started singing. Once the song was over Maggie started laughing again.

"Are you high? This is like the 20th time you've laughed tonight. It was my singing wasn't it." I said picking on her.

"Yea, it was." She said wiping her eyes.

"Well god you could at least be a little nicer bout' it." I said I a sarcastic voice. She replied with the bird and gave me a smile. The rest of the way home was a little less interesting, if you consider a raccoon chasing a cat and a possum chasing the raccoon, or a baby stroller with a stuffed toy puddle in it a little less interesting. Twenty minutes later I was pulling back into the garage. That's when I noticed Maggie was a sleep. Not wanting to wake her up and disturb her beautiful sleeping face, I walked over and picked her up…. Bridal style it was very awkward and it hurt since I've only had my cast on for a week and a half, but I didn't mind I've gone through worse pain before. Once inside I walked up stairs and laid her down in my bed since none of the guest beds had any sheets on them.

After a minute of watching her chest rise and fall, her hair fall around her ears, hearing her slight snore I decided to get a shower seeing I haven't had one in 3 days. As I walked in the bathroom I turned on the heater and grabbed my iPod. Finally finding the song I wanted to listen to I quickly undressed and turned on the water. Of course as always the water was scorching hot and felt fucking amazing. After getting out of the shower I dried off taking my time since Maggie was asleep and it was warm. After getting dried off I realized something…. I forgot my clothes on my dresser right across from my bed. Hoping she was still asleep I wrapped the towel loosely around my waist and walked out the door. Once out there I realized she wasn't even there, giving out a sigh of relief I quickly walked to my dresser and got a shirt and a pair of old ripped up jeans.

"Hey, Gunner I was wo- Whoa… I mean I'm sorry I'll uhh, just go back down stairs" Maggie said turning around, but not before staring for a second. I quickly put on my clothes, walked in the bathroom turned off the heater and grabbed my iPod. I walked down stairs not wanting to find her disgusted and packing up to leave, but instead playing with my knife. Nobody plays with my knife! Number one rule of 'The Expendables'…. Don't touch Gunner's knife! 

"Sorry." She said putting it back in the holster and setting it in the table. "When I get uhh, get distracted by something I play with knives. Don't know why it's just something I've done since my dad gave me my first knife." Slightly aggravated and not wanting to blow up in her face, I calmly reached down grabbed my knife and put it on top of a shelf that I knew she couldn't get to easily. I know it was mean but don't touch my knife.

"Sorry…." She squeaked.

"Nah, it's fine." I said no longer mad at the Asian.

"Gunner?" she asked reaching for a piece of the now cold pizza.

"Yea?"

"C-han I get a s-ower?" she asked with a mouth full of pizza.

"Yea you can use my bathroom if you want."

"Ok, thanks." She said picking up her duffel bag half the size she is and hauled ass up stairs.

A/N: I know how Gunner broke his arm really isn't that believable because Gunner to awesome for that to happen but I couldn't think of anything else sorry but you guys can always give me ideas :P

_**eHeHE**_


	3. Authors Note

Hey guys I'm sooooooooo sry for not updating my computer went down and my moms wi-fi went down at the same time i am truly sorry i promise i'll have another chapter up within the next two weeks


	4. Chapter 4

Ok i feel soooo bad i totally forgot in like the worst writer ever... I swear i will get something up sometime next month promise... I Will NOT let this story die


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